What do you think of this poem?

I decided to revise an old poem I wrote a long time ago, but I'm not sure where to go from here. Any constructive critisism would me much appreciated.

If I could take a journey through out your mind,
To see what you really feel, what you honestly...

love, what you secretly hide,
Tell me what would I find buried in your disastrous heart,
What do you live for? What do you die for? What will make you stop? What can make you start?

And If you could pack your bags just to run away,
To find what you seek in this life, and in this day,
Tell me where would to go,
To escape the cruel irony we call fate,
To escape pressure and temptations, pain and hate.

If you could scream something to the whole wide world,
What would you say to make our hearts twirl?
And what would you say to inspire all of us,
We who have grown sick of life, with lenses covered in dust.

Or would you scream your frustration to make everyone understand,
That we need to accept eachother and walk hand-in-hand?
Would you scream in peace and reassure the broken,
All who cry in silence and remain unspoken.

If I could take a journey though out your mind,
To see what you really feel, what you honestly love, what you secretly hid.
Tell me what would I find buried in your disasterous heart,
What do you life for? What do you die for? What will make you stop? What can make you start?

Wow, that's so good! It's really inspirational, I love it. Keep writing girl!

I liked it too,keep on writing : )

I ♥ this poem

wa, thats pretty dam good. deep