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Should I ask my 21-year-old daughter if she's gay?

Asked by alex113 3 months ago, 18 answers.
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how can I go about asking my 21yr. old daughter if she's gay?

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me. Answered by heytiffany on Apr 28, 2008, 03:20PM
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no.
thats rude.
if she's gay I'm sure she'd tell you.
if my mother ever asked me that I'd feel pissed.
even if I was gay. haha

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Not nice to laugh at other's short comings Answered by ethmer on Apr 28, 2008, 12:12PM
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During a calm conversation, ask her. But be prepared to ACCEPT her whether she is or isn't, and let her know that.

Be supportive of her.

 

no matter what,  smile!!! Answered by spaceyjc on Apr 28, 2008, 12:43PM
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I dont know if I would ask her. does it really matter? will the answer make you love or accept her any less? will it cause a rift in your relationship if she answers you in a way that makes you uncomfortable? if she has not approached you with her orientation, then I would not ask her. she is an adult, and it is her call on letting you in on something that is a very private and personal choice. just love her no matter what, and let her be your daughter!

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Answered by fau on Apr 28, 2008, 12:59PM
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let her come to you when she is ready befor hand make her feel like it is ok for people to be like that and you would not be mad or dissapointed just let her bring it up

Toadaly Answered by toadaly on Apr 28, 2008, 01:32PM
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Why do you feel the need to know details about your adult daughter's sex life? Don't ask.

kitty Answered by ty on Apr 28, 2008, 02:16PM
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I would honestly let her come to you...
I'm assuming you would accept it otherwise you wouldnt be asking this question?
So a general conversation about how her happiness is the most important thing, and you'd accept her no matter what may be needed
Also a conversation about gay people and that there's nothing wrong with it also might be helpful,
Once you've basically made your views on the subject clear then you really need to let her come to you... she may not have told you because she's not sure how you'll react, or she may not have told you because then it would make it real and she's not ready for that yet... or it could be something else...
Give her time and dont take it personally...

Jillian found a pool! Answered by nerd on Apr 28, 2008, 02:20PM
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You shouldn't ask. She will tell her when she is ready (if she is). Maybe you could make it known that you are ok with people who live that lifestyle. That way, if she is a lesbian, she won't feel she will be rejected if she tells you.

Comment for fulfillmysorrows's profile Answered by bubblicious97 on Apr 28, 2008, 02:43PM
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u need to explain more than that! LIKE why do you think she's gay, what did you see her do?, why do you think this? put those detailes in there!!

Because so far the only thing I can tell you is: Walk up to her and say ' Hi honey are you gay??'

Thunder Robot Answered by funadvice on Apr 28, 2008, 02:44PM
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You could in a joking tone say why dont you have a boyfriend in a while you gay or something?
maybe then she could start thinking and wondering that herself
hope I helped

Rhiannon Answered by myzarri on Apr 28, 2008, 03:50PM
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No. Just no.

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Answered by jules22871 on Apr 28, 2008, 10:48PM
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For me, it would have to depend on what kind of a relationship you and your daughter have now. I personally would have no problems asking any of my children that but then again we have a very close relationship. They have been able to come to me with anything. I even packed condoms in my son''s suitcase once for a class ski trip,lol

Take a long hard look at your relationship. Can it stand that question being asked? Can it stand the answer? You have to be able to answer both questions with an honest yes before you can even begin to discuss it with her.

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Answered by shawtylikemine on Apr 29, 2008, 06:53AM
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you mean lesbian if shes gay then thats good cause she likes guys if shes lesbian well I wouldnt think that its good but your the parent but just tell her that you need to talk to her in person and dont let her be offended and just come right out and ask her

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The sunset in greece. Answered by doxuxcxdimxlightx7 on Apr 30, 2008, 12:09PM
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You ight want to. Just do not ask her let her tell you. If it realy is important try this: catch her in a bad mood
then ask her whats wrong
if she says nothing ask her
but dont go right away

yayyy =] Answered by fam0us_barbiiexx on May 01, 2008, 06:45PM
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I personally believe you should casually ask your child in a non threating manner. You as a parent have a right to know I believe. Just ensure that regardless of the answer that you will be supportive. If they feel like you are intruding just inform them that you would rather find out directly through them then some unreliable source. Hope it helps =]

curly hair :] Answered by loulou11 on May 02, 2008, 07:21AM
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I would see bein alright to ask if she was like 15 or 16 but 21 she's an adult. she makes decisions for herself. if she wants you to know she'll come to you. cause if she's not you might make her mad and hurt her feelings. she's her own person just let her be and if she wants you to know she'll tell you.

Answered by 4everfriends on May 02, 2008, 06:45PM
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Does it really matter that she might be gay I mean really.You should do some more investagating before going up to her and say 'honey your gay im your mom I have a feeling you are so aren't you?'No bad mother let her come to you dah.

MY FAVE CHARACTER Answered by meech on May 06, 2008, 09:08AM
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U SHOULD ASK BUT NO IN A RUDE WAY AND DONT ASK IF THERE IS MORE THAN you AN HER you DONT WANT TO EMBARRASE HER IN FRONT OF people SHE MITE want to KEEPE IT A SECRET

Thunder Robot Answered by funadvice on May 06, 2008, 07:15PM
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Well, it depends. If you REALLY think she is, calmly bring it up. If you really need to, talk to someone else about it. They could help you figure it out.

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