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Maybe you could celebrate in a different way. My soon to be brother-in-law once hired a barge for a canal trip for his birthday. If you don't want to party, just find another way to help your mum celebrate - it's going to be a big day for her when her 'little girl' turns 21, even if it doesn't feel like much to you.
I kinda felt the same about my 21st- partially because I'm not the type of person who has a lot of really close friends. It kinda felt like a non-event, even though it's usually celebrated as the 'coming of age'. My parents decided they were throwing a party, and they gave me the choice if whether I wanted to go or not. I also ended up having a few drinks with a few friends to celebrate. It's more about reaching a compromise.
Talk to your mum about it- if you're not over the moon about a huge celebration, suggest something like a small family dinner with a few friends. That way, your birthday doesn't go by unnoticed, and it's not too over the top. I've had friends who have gone past their 21st birthdays without celebrating it, and they have regretted it.
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Is it weird that I don't want to celebrate my birthday?
I turn 21 this year and I don't want to have a party. My mum says there's something wrong with me. However, I live in Australia and you don't get any more rights when you're 21 than when you're 18, so I don't see why it's so special.