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You are even younger then me, I'm 18. I am an hournoring english student, and have a good paying job. My boyfriend of 2 years (at the time) had a son which I was helping him with. Once I was around them for SO long, I wanted to start a family of my own, that was it, my mind wasn't changing. My boyfriend and I started having unprotected sex all the time, trying for a baby. When I got negative preg. tests I was always so sad, thats how much I wanted a child. So I came on this site, posting questions about how to know when I was fertile and stuff. I got a lot of negative comments back, people saying I was way to young and stuff. I got mad reading that stuff because its like they didn't even know me so they had no right saying I shouldnt have a kid. But then, I decided to take everything into consideration just because I wanted the best. Two of my friends had babies, no long do they have friends, or much of a life at all. All of their time goes to the baby, all their money goes to the baby. Buying packs of diapers for the baby every day. They don't have money for anything, they are living off welfare, they were once in your position, young... free. But not anymore, they had a BABY on their shoulder. You may not think you will lose your friends, but once you have absolutly no time or patients for them, they will slowly walk away. What if your parents don't accept it? Then what? I know parents suck most of the time, but you have to think about them to, your their baby still and if you had a baby they would probley feel like failures. Do you really want that? What about a father? What happens when your child is asking where daddy is? I can almost guarentee the father wont stick around, or pay child support, ull be lucky if you ever hear from him again.What will happen when its fathers day at school and your kid doesnt have a father to take to school, because they were a result in this. Think about how that child will grow up and feel like, probley never meeting their dad. I thought my boyfriend of 2 years would stick around, once I told him I was no longer ready for a baby, he left me... just like that, 2 years of my life down the drain.
You really have a lot of thinking to do, and I really hope you make the right choice. Think of what direction your life will go. A lot of teens end up having pre-mature babies because their bodies aren't fully devloped yet and your baby could end up with serious illnesses. Please, don't put a child through this. I know what its like to want one, but you really need to think first, and think hard. I know I cant make you change your mind but I'm hoping I can help you because people helped me. If you want to talk im here for you. I know that I don't know much about you, but im sure you are smart enough to make the right decision.
I know you really want a baby..
But um. It is going to affect your life. Dramatically.
Especially your near future.
School, Highschool, Hanging out with friends.
You'll need a part time job to support the baby. But what will you do with the baby when you are at work?
There are sooo many drawbacks to having a baby at that age. Just think; you have your whole life.
Personally. I say, give it a few more years. By that, I mean, around 10..
Get a job, and make lots of money so you can proberly support the baby when you do have one.
Look at it this way. A baby is a 25 year project which involves not just time, but money as well. Can you afford the time and money?
You're looking for responsibilites? How about some goldfish? Seriously though, How about doing some volunteer work with underprivileged people in your area, senior citizens, soup missions, that would be wonderful for character building and to impress others.
I think you should ask her then if she says no ask her in another 5 months she'll break
While we live in this great country the USA where you have the freedom to bear a child if you wish - it doesn't mean it's the right thing for you, the father or the baby.
There are a lot of things to consider.
Are you getting a job to support the baby?
Are you financially secure?
do you have health insurance?
Is your job secure?
Do you have your own place?
What about transportation?
Will you be able to go back to work right away?
Will you have to depend on ONLY His income for a time?
Will you be dependent on your parent's income?
Are your parent's ok with that?
What if the baby is sick, is your job/school going to allow you to be away?
Here's what you should do to get a picture of WHY everyone is telling you the things they are telling you.
Get a recent newspaper and look for a place to rent. Write down how much it would cost to rent a month.
Now figure out your utilities(heat, water, sewage, trash pickup, electric etc) and how much they would cost a month.
Do you want cable tv? internet? add those costs in there too.
Car payments? Add that.
Don't forget about the delivery! It easily costs between $5,000-$8,000 for a normal vaginal delivery, up to $12,000 for a cesarean delivery and much more if there are complications. If you are covered by insurance, it may cover most of the cost.
If you plan to use disposable diapers, plan on spending between $1,600-$2,300 by the time your baby is potty-trained. Expect your baby to go through at least 7-8 diapers a day on average and spending $80-$130 a month on diapers alone (especially in the first few months, when changes are more frequent.)
For formula (up until your baby is one-year-old), expect to spend between $1,000-$2,300- depending on whether you use powder in a can or ready-to-pour liquids. Plan on spending at least $40 a week on infant formula.
Don't forget about food for you, him and baby!
This is a break-down of the average prices for baby items (not all are a necessity.)
Crib with mattress- $160-$750
Crib bedding set- $35-$270
Crib blankets (4-6)- $8-$40 each
Fitted crib sheets (2)- $8-$20 each
Water-proof mattress cover- $10-$20
Bassinet or cradle- $35-$260
Changing table- $70-$600
Changing pad & cover- $25-$50
Dresser- $90-$650
Rocker or glider- $90-$500
Car seat- $35-$280
Stroller or travel system- $30-$300
Playpen or porta-crib- $60-$180
Swing- $45-$130
Play center or walker- $50-$125
Mobile- $25-$70
Baby carrier or sling- $20-$140
Monitor- $20-$230
Baby gate- $35-$250
Bouncer seat- $30-$90
Toy box- $25-$90
Gym or play mat- $25-$90
Doorway jumper- $25-$60
High chair- $45-$240
Diaper bag- $10-$60
Diaper pail- $20-$45 Refills- $15-$20 (3 pack)
Thermometer- $10-$90
First aid supplies (kit)- $20-$30
Humidifier or vaporizer- $15-$130
Bottles 8 oz & 4 oz (8-10)- $10-$20 (3 pack) or $20-$40 (starter set)
Bottle warmer- $18-$35
Sterilizer- $30-$70
Breast pump & accessories- $45-$350
Breastfeeding pillow- $20-$35
Bath tub or seat- $15-$35
Hooded towels (4)- $6-$30 each
Wipes (a lot)- $4-$5 (pack)
Clothes for first year- $500-$1,200
Add all that up. Now do you see why having a baby at 15 isn't a good idea?
You're 15 and have your whole life ahead of you. I definitely don't think you should get pregnant right now. I think your desire to have a baby right now is stemming from loneliness.
Why not get a puppy or a kitten or like what pinkpearl said - maybe work at a funeral home or a daycare?
xox
Sika
People here are wise in telling you to wait. As it's been repeatedly said, you're 15- you have a whole life ahead of you. A baby will weigh you down at this stage.
I wanted a baby for a while as well- I felt like it would fill up this hole I had inside me, make me feel a little more complete. But I've also known, deep down, that it wouldn't be right for me to bring a child into the world right now. Especially since my reasons for wanting one aren't all the best. My partner and I talk about it, and we want to wait a few years. We're getting married in a few months, and plan on starting a family 2-5 years later, after we've traveled and saved a bit, not to mention found a country/house to settle in and call home. Children need stability, and with my life being so hectic at the moment, I couldn't give that to a baby.
I currently work as an au pair/nanny part time, for 2 gorgeous boys aged 5, and nearly 3. I love those little guys to bits- even nappy changing doesn't bother me too much. But as much as I'm sad when I say goodbye in the evenings, I am so glad I can come home, have time to myself, go out with friends, sleep in on weekends, go out clubbing... without a little one attached to me.
Getting a kitten is a great idea- I did, and she's still my baby. That's one of the best things about cats- they always remain a baby to you, they love you unconditionally, and they never ask for money! Try babysitting- put an ad in the paper, get a feel for what it's like taking care of a small child. You'll appreciate your freedom a lot more!
wow your only 15. I mean im 16 and I would like to have a baby but there are other ways... why dont you try to get a babysitting job? Because at your age there aint much jobs you can get to support it. Because it only seems like you would need around $600 in baby stuff but im taking parenting classes in school and when I seen the list I was like whoa!!! Yah not a good idea... But Good Luck!
no. I wanted a baby when I was young too. Something is missing in your life that makes you want that. I had it bad growing up, I felt very unloved by my dad and my mom didn't pay attention to me enough. I wanted a baby. It was like trying to start a new life and leaving bad memories behind. But it isn't a good idea. You need to evaluate why you want a baby. If it is to meet your need to feel loved, I suggest not to. If you bring in a baby to meet your personal satisfaction you will eventually cause damage to a poor child, and that is not a mature responsible choice. You are still young, and have a lot to learn, yes anyone can be a parent, but most parents that started young regret starting out so young. Just think about it. You will lose your beautiful body before you are fully developed. Babies are very demanding and selfish naturally. You wont get the kinda love you need from a child. Accomplish all you can in life find the right person and live life free right now. Things may seem lonely at times, but trust me it gets lonlier when you are by yourself with a baby. Please live your life to the fullest first, if yu have one now, you WILL have regrets. Good things in life are worth waiting for. Take my advice, good luck to you.
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Should I have a baby?
Hello.
Im 15 years old and I have wanted a baby ever sence I was 14!
My mom and brother never really pay attention to me and it makes me feel really empty.
If I had a baby I think it would show them that I am responsible enough to handle something that...
big on my own.
I just dont no how to tell my mom I want one with out her automatically saying no...
What should I do??