I feel like I'm not really here

a lot of really horrible stuff is happening in my life right now and I just can't cope with it. Sometimes I can't come to terms with I'm here, like I'm a person. Its worrying me. For example, I was in the Garden and I walked into the house and I just...

realised I'd been in the Garden, and I can't actually remember walking into the garden or being in there. But its also like I'm walking down the street and when people dodge you in the crowd to save walking into you I can't believe they're trying to dodge me because I'm not there, and I just don't feel like a person. Like I'm only one person in this whole planet, thats nothing. And I only mean something to about 5 people. I don't think people will miss me when I'm dead. I feel so awful about thinking like this and I can't remember the last time I was truly happy. How can I stop feeling like this? I hate it. Please help.

Aww, don't worry, hang around with you mates ?
Aww you a girl because if you are you can have girly times with
your mates,
If your boy, go chat up women, lol, Just do things that you did before which made you happy.
♥

I'm sure people are about you and would miss you if you were gone, so don't think like that. If this was something that just started happening, I would wonder if you a worried or stressed out about something.

However, you said it's been going on forever. If that's the case you might need to see someone professionally to make sure you aren't suffering from a state of depression since its been going on for so long.

If you don't want to take that step yet try doing things you enjoy and make you happy. Hangout with friends, catch up on a hobby, what one of your fav movies. Thing of happy thoughts. Reach out to someone who can pull you back in. It'll get better. Feel free to hit me up if you need to talk. Later.

Sounds like you're 'detatching" a bit... which IS a coping mechanism for traumatic events. It's normal for us to sometimes feel numb when something bad is happening.
You have to realize that sometimes bad things just happen to good people. And that happiness doesn't just come to you, sometimes you have to go out and find it.

So get out of the house and do something you like. Write down activities that you like to do and then make an active choice to get out and DO them.

And I'm sure you mean something to more than 5 people. Think of some people that mean a lot to you, and how much to you actually show them that you care?(basically put yourself in other people's shoes) It'll open your perspective that there are people out there that DO genuinely care, but maybe you just don't notice.

xox
Sika