How can I make my girlfriend more secure?

Hi,

I'm 16 years old, I've been with a girl for about 8 months. We both love eachother to death. My girlfriend, cheated on me three times. The way she described it, she was manupulated each time, they were her ex-es. The first two was just flirting,...

etc. The second one was serious. She had sex with her ex boyfriend as I was on vacation. Since the beginning of our relationship, she's always told me not to cheat. We're always getting into arguements about me 'possibly' cheating on her in the future? Yesterday, I was out with her, I looked another way for a minute, she thought I was checking out another girl. I honestly don't know what to do, I hate arguements, I love her, if I didn't I would have broken up wit hher. Is there anything I can do?

This relationship is not based on trust. It will never work. As hard as it is to do, break up with her and slowly get over it. The longer you wait, the harder it is to let go.

You don't think there's ANY way to work through it? ...

hya babiiee, she soundzz like a bit of a slut who cnt like ya because she cud do it 3 times, she wants dumpin you can do betterrr. she obviously don't care bout ya so leave er and move on. x xx x

Why do you stay with someone who has cheated on you 3 times? Sounds like you have some insecurity problems too. Your girlfriend is like a bottle of sour milk in the fridge. You don't keep going back and tasting it to see if it has gotten better. Do you think that if you give her enough chances, she'll magically become a good girl?" There's no advice or magic wand to turn a cheater into a prince or princess. Consider them a lost cause and move on. Once you set your standards back where they belong, you'll be able to meet and maintain a relationship with the kind of person you truly want to be with.

I know, it's not right what she did. I know there's no excuse for it. She's been hurt in the past, people have used her emotions and manipulated her. It's not that I want to break up with her. I just want to find a way to show her that she CAN trust me, and I DO love her.

She obviously has some insecurity problems. And I'm not sure if you CAN find a way to show her she can trust you. You should ask yourself, does she REALLY love you if she has cheated on you so many times? Is this relationship causing you more grief than it is happiness? I know I wouldn't want to be in your situation. I suggest you just try talking to her. reassuring her she's beautiful etc. I don't know how much help this will be though. If she continues on like this, maybe a break would be good.

Just because she's been hurt in the past doesn't mean she has the right to hurt you (and herself) NOW. Besides, you don't have to be her BOYFRIEND to show her that she can trust you - you can do it simply by being her FRIEND. Like I said, this relationship will never work.

Plus, this girl needs to learn to be in control of her own life. She needs to learn that SHE (and not you, sorry) is the one person can make herself happy. If she was hurt in the past, she should get over it and make some changes. You could try to make her realize this, but you don't have to put up with her as her boyfriend.

It's not that I want to stick around for her to trust me. I want to be her boyfriend, just not the girl that cheats. The girl I fell in love with,,,

Okay, she wants to know that she can trust you. But yet, does she think YOU have a reason for not trusting her?
You do!
She cheated on you . . .
3 times.
I think she's playing you. I don't think she would have let herself be manupulated THAT many times. Time after time again.
I think, even though you love her, you should dump her. It doesn't sound liek she loves you back. If she cheated on you that many times before, she'll just do it again. . .
And again, and again, and again, and again.
Until you stop it.
And if you just don't want to break up with her and cause yourself the heart-break that she will eventually cause, or already has caused, then go right ahead. let her use you time after time after time.
She'll just keep cheating on you. I know you love her, but you need to find someone you can trust and who can trust you.
And someone who will be loyal to you and treat you with SOME kind of respect.

dude I've been in your positoin before just not that severe..me and my girl have also been going out 8 months..she cheated on me about a month ago she didnt have sex with the guy just dry humping or w/e it crushed my f.uckin heart in a thousand places..so I broke up with her and she worke so hard to get me back she has changed like you wouldnt believe our relationship is so much bettr we had sex the other day for the first time and well ya I know she really loves me and I love her too...but with you bro its completely diff..ok this girl had sex with another guy man come on now and well the other two dont count every girl flirts..but dude dont let her do that to you if you really think you guys love eachother break up with her and see what happns if she loves you that means shes willing to do anything to get you back thats how my relationship went she did everything to get me back I've never seen someone cry so much amnd tell me there srry and a bunch of stuff thats unexplainable so my advice break it off and if she comes back then she does if she doesnt then you know wats up...but let me ask you spomething did you guys have sex before she did it with her ex???

Alright. Sex does NOT equal love. Why is that concept so hard to get through people's heads..

Be wise, and end the relationship immediately. OBVIOUSLY she can trust you.. that's clearly not the problem. She cheated on you 3 times!! A relationship is nothing without trust, so before things get any worse, break up.

Just because this girl has had a tough life beforehand... does NOT excuse her behavior. I could understand her maybe not trusting guys as well, but cheating is something ANYONE can avoid with some maturity.

Again, leave her. And DO NOT get back together.

One more thing though... I find it amazing how you can change your gender! Seriously, your last question on this site.. care to explain?

Robots have no gender!