Am I losing my sense of reality?

I have a boyfrend and we have been together over 4 years now. He has done everything imaginable from the drugs, alcohol, abusing me and finally cheating on me. We break up and then for some ungodly reason we get back together. My friends think I have...

lost touch with reality. I cheated on him to get rid of him and it still didn't work. He calls me at work and asks the stupidest questions or smart-a** comments about one of my co-workers I hung out with when we broke up. What should I do? I don't want to go home to him, but I do love him because he can be okay sometimes. I feel like this is a dream and the same time I feel as the nightmare won't end. Help somebody? I am losing my mind. He always accuses me and when I bring up the past he gets pissed. Like he is so perfect and what he did to me is all in the past and I should focus on our future. Confused???

okay... you are very confused! the best advice I can give you is to think stuff deeply... get away and think if this relationship is good for you and for him... it seems to me that you guys are used to treating each other like this and its not healthy for you and for him either... you said he did f=drugs, abusing and cheating! you seem like a very loyal girl... well I say you get away from him and try to start fresh... meet new people... sometimes we think we love someone when in reality we're just ised to be treated like that or you just spend so much time with that person you dont mind what they do to you... and thats NOT right... I hope I helped... im going through a breakup and I know how stuff like this feels:[ if you need to talk just messg me:]

You BOTH have severe problems, and staying together will only worsen the problems.

Just bc he's ok sometimes doesn't mean he's the guy you should be with. If you want to be happy you can leave him for good. He treats you like sh!t and you can find better.