How to make my daughter see that she's too young to move out?

Asked by norma3770 about 1 year ago, 13 answers.

I have a 17 yr. old daughter w/ a 14 month old daughter who wants to move out with her new boyfriend of 7 months. We have given her everything for her and our granddaughter and now because her boyfriend does not work he does farm chores and makes little...

pay under the table and it's not enough money to survive the real world and she's still in school taking her ged because he told her too.
Please help. Don't know what to do, I took granddaughter to mall only for 1 hour and she yelled at me now will not let me babysit anymore...Now wants to move out for GOOD.. (boyfriend not the father of child)

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Answered by funadvice on Sep 21, 2007, 10:01PM
| 42400 answers.

So your daughter wants to move out with a boyfriend who is not the father of her daughter? If I were you, I would let her do it. She doesn't sound respectful to you and she may not even realize how much of a help you've been. As much as you love her, you should let her live on her own so she could see where she stands in this world. Don't offer her any more help unless she personally asks for it. She's the one who made a mistake; she's the one who's going to fix it.

Answered by funadvice on Sep 21, 2007, 11:15PM
| 42400 answers.

Yeah,I agree with xiigzag. Your daughter should know that you have been a help to her. Let her find out how she has to cope in the world without your help.

Answered by funadvice on Sep 22, 2007, 05:05AM
| 42400 answers.

I agrre with those other too she will come runnign back trust!!!

Answered by funadvice on Sep 22, 2007, 09:05AM
| 42400 answers.

Yep. She's old enough to make mistakes, her situation is a testament to that. Let her do it, she'll be back...

Answered by che3rbayb4eva on Sep 22, 2007, 12:22PM
| 5 answers.

Hey im actually 18 and pregnant I understand were your coming from and all and I understand how she feels... unfortunatly when I moved out I didnt go back but I deff can say dont push her away.. let her feel free and no that she can make her own dicisions,, dont demand or force her to do anything because my parents trying to control everything I did is what made me leave.. I ran away at 17 before my baby and they had me down as missing in action 4 a week tll I was arrested and brought home then I was on pined (person in need of supporvision.,.) I was then not allowed to leave while I was under aged.. even tho it seems like the parent now has control and make you stay its what made me run the minute I got freedom...

Answered by lana17 on Sep 22, 2007, 04:09PM
| 70 answers.

Just agree and let her move out. Once her boyfriend sees how hard it is to be without helpful support your daughter will realize she missed you and that it was easier when you were there to help her.

Answered by iamyours on Sep 22, 2007, 06:45PM
| 5 answers.

LET HER DO IT!!
SHE CAN NOT BE HELD DOWN FOREVER.

Answered by tamarahurst on Sep 26, 2007, 01:04PM
| 36 answers.

In a way I would like to say yes, let her go and discover what it's like to be an adult in a adult world, but in a way I would also like to say no. Because, it sounds like they are in a stage where they want to "play house"... and they don't realize what living alone at such a young age really contains. "They will have no freedom, cause there will not be a live-in-babysitter anymore, she will probably not finish school, and eventually, he will get tired of having a child around, and he'll probably leave your daughter with nothing.

Answered by goaty on Sep 26, 2007, 06:12PM
| 37 answers.

I think you just have to let her go, she is obviously determined to do it and by trying to stop her will only make her resent you more.She is still young and she will realise after a short while that maybe its not as fun and as easy as she thought it would be. Its something that she has to experience and by her doing this it will make her realise just what a good support you were and how much you really helped her while she was living at home. Believe me, it wont be long until she will be ringing you up asking for your help,
she will be missing her freedom and will soon realise that having a young child with her constantly without a break is not as easy as she might think it will be now.
Hang in there and be there for her and support her and it wont be long until she will appreciate you and your help and maybe it will strengthen your relationship with her in the long run. good luck.

Answered by luckybaby27 on Oct 03, 2007, 12:57PM
| 77 answers.

If you think the baby is in danger... and that they really will not financially be able to take care of it... neglect it... etc, then you should first make it clear to her what you think about the situation, how much you have done for her, and that she CANNOT possibly do it without your financial and moral support. (make sure she knows how much it is to take care of a baby-- I think nowadays its aroun $7,000/year) If she takes the baby and you feel the baby is not in good hands and really is in danger, than contact authorities and try to get an open adoption.

Answered by withoutlovex on Oct 05, 2007, 08:55PM
| 6 answers.

My older brother moved out around 17 - 19 years old. Hes doing just fine. He just got accepted a job application and makes good money. But then again.. hes 23 now. Even if your daughter is making a mistake she'll come back to you. For now, let her learn from her mistakes.

Answered by chickie_poo on Nov 06, 2007, 06:03PM
| 76 answers.

im 20 years old with a 2/12 year old son im doing great im going to school taking care of my son with we are doing great I moved out when I was 16

Answered by funadvice on Jan 25, 2008, 01:00PM
| 42400 answers.

well thats a tough one well I would say if she's 17 then that's pretty young she should wait to move out at least another year that's my advice well hope you figure it out ok and good luck.

pooka

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