15 and pregnant, but it was rape...what should i do?

Asked by sara_b 3 months ago, 13 answers.

Hi Im 15 and was raped by my sisters husband and now im 8months preg... Im not sure wether I should keep him or give him up for adoptiion. My parents are very supportive and will help with whatever they need to. But its such a hard decision because its...

family related and I dont want the dad getting parental rights. Anys suggestion???

Answered by babygirl1220 on Oct 09, 2008, 06:24AM
261 answers
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1) Did you tell the police about the rape?
-Yes: I know that was hard...good for you...dont give him the opportunity to do it again!
-No: The authorities need to know!
2) You need to ask your self if you are ready to do this...You are being incredibly brave by carrying out the pregnancy as it is...there is no shame at all in saying "I am not ready to do this"...You were forced into a situation that (I assume) you would not otherwise be in...
Another thing you need to think about is the fact that chances are your baby is going to look like your brother-in-law...some people are able to handle that and others are not and again there is no shame at all if you dont think you are able to handle that...
You and your family need to sit down and think if you (as a unit) can give this baby a great life...or if maybe someone else can give your baby a better life...the decison is yours to make and there are a lot of things to think about

Good luck in what ever you chose and if you need anything at all feel free to FunMail me!
-Caitlyn

2 people thought this was helpful

Answered by amber_neal on Oct 09, 2008, 06:01AM
19 answers

Dude follow your heart if you want to keep the baby keep him...happy

Answered by colethky on Oct 09, 2008, 06:13AM
2416 answers
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Keeping a child of rape will be hard but if you think that you're strong enough to do it then do it. Try to remember though that years from now if you feel any resentment toward that child he will know. Giving up the baby is a very selfless act that also takes a strong person. You would most likely have to go to court to make sure the father gives up his rights (it's not fair but rapists...according to the courts...have rights too). If you keep the child you will also have to go to court to make sure the father can not get visitation. If it was me, I would probably give the baby up for adoption. Only because of how young you are and the circumstances in which he was conceived. You can also do an open adoption where you get to pick the parents and still have contact with the child. You would also be able to have pictures of your son.

It will be a hard decision to make but make sure that you decide what you want, not what your family wants, after all it is your body, your baby and your life that will be affected forever.

Good luck

Answered by stephanief987 on Oct 09, 2008, 07:04AM
13004 answers
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If it were me I'd put it up for adoption - I don't know how anyone could raise a baby knowing they are here due to rape. And having that child grow up and know their dad raped their mom and that's why they're there, it would just be such a mess.

Go tell the police.

Answered by ty on Oct 09, 2008, 07:25AM
7159 answers
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You should go to the police, given that you are underage you dont even need to prove the rape, once the baby is born he can go to jail for stat rape...

Answered by amblessed on Oct 09, 2008, 07:47AM
9237 answers

Adoption to an established, loving family is a Great option - prayerfully consider and do what would be the most loving thing for your baby - seek advice from a wise adult (outside the family or in authority) as to the best way to proceed forward, considering reporting and getting the financial support due your baby - I'm so sorry you were put in this situation and wish you every happiness in your future...you're in my thoughts and prayers.

Answered by harleyrider on Oct 09, 2008, 07:50AM
1588 answers

you are young and have been threw a lot. I am glad to hear your family is there for you and I hope your sister filed for a divorce and take him for everything he has and that you did go to police. Other then that I think only you can make such a choice. It is your life not ours and you need to do what you feel. There are lovley couples out there that cannot have a baby and I am sure they would provide a wonderful life. Even so it is your choice and your life and a choice you have to live with.

Answered by emogall100 on Oct 09, 2008, 09:26AM
112 answers

my moms a lawyer and she does adoptions, custody, and divorces. she taught me a few thing about the law in those situations.if the guy raped you that would make him a danger to society and the baby so if you take it to court most likely the judge will grant you sole custody. as for the keeping or adoption part do what feels right in your heart.im adopted and im very happy with the mom that I got I was adopted when I was 8 days old.my personal oppinion is if your not ready to be a mom do what you think is right.if you keep the baby congrats on being a mommy.listen to your heart and do whats best for the baby. as for your sisters husband*cartman voice* KICK HIM IN THE NUTS

Answered by lifeis2short4nonsense94 on Oct 09, 2008, 09:47AM
51 answers

I would keep the baby because for me personally, I dont believe in abortions. Think about it. If your parents had a abortion with you, you wouldnt be here. you wouldnt have accomplished everything you had done in life so far. Im only a year younger than you. Im 14. You should go with what your heart says, and if you feel that you are ready to be a mother, than go for it. I'm sorry that you were raped and the person that raped you must be really cold hearted. In my opinion, I thinl that you should keep the baby. Do you really want someone else to take care of your child??? these are things that you have to think about.

Answered by hcp13240 on Oct 09, 2008, 10:51AM
149 answers

did you tell the police?

Answered by prestonsmommy on Oct 09, 2008, 12:43PM
17 answers

My question is, how can your parents be ok with their son in law getting their 15 year old daughter pregnant

Answered by misty363 on Oct 12, 2008, 11:38AM
285 answers

I think the best thing would be to put it up for adoption, like other people said its not fair to the child who will someday find out they there were an outcome of rape, its not fair to you to have to care for this child if you were raped...your so young and not mature enough and it would be best for the child, it will go to a family whos ready and willing to give the child their everything

Answered by tessa71 on Oct 22, 2008, 10:35PM

I think that the choice is up to you. If you decided on adoption I would love to talk to you more. My husband and I have been trying for a baby for two years and are now looking into open adoption.

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